This is a man's world....

So my better half has asked me to give a viewpoint into the world of infertility from the eyes of a husband. To start maybe I should explain what being a husband means to me. As a husband I feel like it is my job to make my wife happy in every way that I can. That means the small things like taking out the trash without having to be asked, remembering to tell her how much I appreciate all the she does to keep our home up while I'm at work, or tucking her hair behind her ear before I give her a kiss. On the other hand there are all the big things as well. It is my job to protect her from all of the bad things of this world. If that means fighting a dragon with a pillow and some water balloons to keep her safe, then so be it. Well to me, this PCOS and infertility problem is even bigger than a dragon. It is like some mythical creature that I can't see, can't touch, and the only sound it makes is the muffled tears through a bathroom door at the passing of another month.

It's pretty hard to express in words how hard it is to see the most important person in the world to you suffer and fight against something. It is even worse to know that there is nothing you can do to fix it. I'm a fixer, I'm a fighter, I don't even know how to sit still when I get home from work exhausted, let alone while she is suffering like she does. And then there is the feelings she has of having to deal with everything alone because I can't understand what it's like, "To be broken", as she puts it. And the worst part is, she's correct, I can't understand how she feels, despite my desperately wanting to. So there is all of the wonderful fun of not being able to do my job as a husband.

Then you add to that the wanting a baby so bad I can't stand it. I've never loved anyone as much as I love my wife, and the thought of having children with her makes me so happy. And no matter how hard we try we can't seem to make a baby. And of course everyone we know is now having children, which only makes it even harder. All in all, this situation sucks for everyone. I just thought that maybe some of her readers may be interested in a brief view through the window into the life of infertility as a loving husband. This is a man's world.....or at least this is this man's world...