I'm NOT too Sexy

Today marked a milestone in my life.

I hope.

Today, I do believe I experienced the most embarrassing moment of my life.

I hope. Please, God, let this be it.

After being a hermit for 9 long days and not leaving my house once (I'm kinda proud of that) I ventured out today. Grocery shopping needed to be done and errands needed to be run.

All was going well until I was in the grocery store, looking at the seafood (for my husband, not me. I hate seafood) when something happened. Something horribly familiar.

I froze in my moment of panic and looked around and realized that I had two choices in front of me. My Coach purse or the floor.

The choice was obvious.

I doubled over and puked all over the floor. I lost my lunch right there in the middle of a crowded grocery store and people were all around. And I couldn't stop.

When I was done I hightailed it. I didn't know what else to do. I just ran. A little old lady started chasing me yelling and asking if I was alright but I was simply too humiliated to stop.

And now.... Now I need to find a new grocery store because obviously I can never go there ever again.

I would just like to let the Universe know that I have officially reached my lifetime cap on embarrassing moments. So, Universe, give the rest you had stored up for me to someone else. I don't need them anymore.